The Two Sides of the Buck

/ Greg Jabal

When you are living and working abroad, for most Filipinos, you are affluent. A common mindset which do not consider the underlying factors to validate such assertion. In spite of countless documentaries regarding migrants’ plight and glory, news, social media posts and the likes, it is an unalterable viewpoint of our compatriots that overseas migrants are financially wealthy.

“To live and work abroad”, in itself, is merely an opportunity. A journey of every single migrant that entails diverse stories of sacrifices and successes, failures and learning, joys and pains, struggles and triumphs among other things. Generally, it is the same old story of skirmishes and hard works alike in the battlefield of the so called “life”. Nevertheless, only few understand this plight of overseas migrants.

With high hopes of having a better life, compared to what they had in the Philippines, they are now in a journey to stand on and to be spiritually strong to face challenges, to live out of comfort zone and to work painstakingly every day to ensure both ends meet.

Leaving one’s comfort zone and living out from it is a great challenge to accept. The comforts of having a house helper to do household chores and having ample time for the family and friends after work and so forth, need abrupt adjustments. Living out from comfort zone embraces doing home errands and duties independently, and having two or more jobs in different time shifts sacrificing family time are ordinary daily routine. Engagement to multi jobs keeps them busy to escape from and overcome homesickness. Work here and there, to earn for the family’s daily provisions, to pay taxes, mortgages, utility bills, insurances, credit cards and other financial liabilities. At this juncture, significant amount of cash is allotted for remittance homeward to their families and relatives.

On the other hand, countless opportunities await for those who dare, for those who are adeptly equipped, for those who knew how to leverage themselves, for those who are aware and responsive to the realities, and for those who have willingness to learn new things. Migrants must accept and skillfully adapt to the challenges of their new social and physical environment. One’s character, optimistic attitude, hard work, and their practice of humility to name a few are catalysts for this life-changing move towards successful international migration.

Control of the situations and factual decisions are in the migrants’ hands. Too much expectations, by their love ones left behind, would lead to letdowns and opposing circumstances. To be straightforward to them is essential. Keeping track of one’s goal needs awareness of one’s capability and a vivid grounding of personal limitations and boundaries.  Even though, they would not believe instantaneously, at least you have been honest to yourself. Disregard their retorts and keep your self-esteem intact. In doing so, emotional pressure and psychological stress will be lessened and at the same time elating your spirit.

One of the spoken expectations from the family is to help them alleviate from paucity. Such basic expectation is obligatory in nature, seems like to be the migrant’s sole responsibility. The epitome of success like huge house, a new car, modern appliances and newest gadgets, serve as status symbols in the community. In this scenario, packages of imported goods, allowances, festive gatherings, donations among other things define your strong relationship, telling that you have not changed to them.

Sending siblings or relatives to college, profligate family fetes, traditional celebrations like Christmas, fiesta, wedding, and the like, financial support is highly anticipated. Those expectations pressure migrants to maintain their good image and connections to them, at the expense of putting the burdens upon their shoulders.

The flow of assistance, big or small, from relatives abroad must be valued. This support must augment basic necessities, not to satisfy wants. Too, financial help must be spent prudently and efficiently to serve its purpose which is to live a decent life. In the contrary, dependency becomes the outcome of incoming support from abroad. Reliance of family members and close relatives instigate nonproductive and lavish lifestyle.

Overwhelmingly, family expectations turn out to be demands not just hope. Their family members, siblings, relatives, friends and former workmates have different expectations, too. Yet, to them, the phrase: “living or working abroad” implies material abundance. No account could make them believe that life abroad is not easy, that everything is earned through hardship and lots of patience and sacrifices. Neither objection nor rationality would position them to become judgmental. You had changed a lot and you become selfish and arrogant because of your reformed perspectives and outlook in life.

In this life course, never be dragged in the race towards climbing the social ladder nor follow what social trends dictate and what people expect, you will never win. Establish a standard of your own to follow because you alone would be standing in the battleground. No one else would be on your side during that quest, they would just willingly join to rejoice your victory.

Profound understanding of this social phenomenon would basically base on lived-experiences, an unfolding process, giving way to its lucidity. Given the chance to live overseas, I withstand and am witnessing on my very own eyes, the realities of living away from one’s homeland and becoming a stranger.

Our loved ones, relatives, friends and fellow countrymen see these things from afar, depicting life in a faraway land as a haven of free-flowing milk and honey. I do respect their views. As you do, I am seeing this prevalence in the similar angle before I migrate. However, I am now one of the actors of the Filipino diaspora who lives in such reality, not in the realm of thoughts.

2,164 thoughts on “The Two Sides of the Buck”

  20. Greate post. Keep posting such kind of information on your blog.
    Im really impressed by your blog.
    Hello there, You’ve performed a fantastic job.
    I’ll definitely digg it and personally recommend to my friends.
    I am confident they will be benefited from this web site.

    Like

    Reply

  21. My coder is trying to persuade me to move to .net from PHP.
    I have always disliked the idea because of the costs.
    But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using Movable-type on a
    number of websites for about a year and am nervous about switching to another platform.
    I have heard fantastic things about blogengine.net. Is there
    a way I can import all my wordpress posts into it?
    Any kind of help would be greatly appreciated!

    Like

    Reply

  28. Pretty section of content. I just stumbled upon your web site and in accession capital to assert that I get actually
    enjoyed account your blog posts. Anyway I will be subscribing to
    your feeds and even I achievement you access consistently rapidly.

    Like

    Reply

  39. Greetings I am so grateful I found your blog page, I really found you
    by accident, while I was researching on Google for something else,
    Anyhow I am here now and would just like to say thanks a lot for a incredible post and a all round
    thrilling blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have time to go through it all at the minute but I have saved it and also added in your RSS feeds,
    so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do
    keep up the fantastic work.

    Like

    Reply

  40. Hello, I believe your site could be having web browser compatibility
    problems. When I take a look at your site in Safari, it looks fine however, if opening in I.E., it has
    some overlapping issues. I simply wanted to provide you with a
    quick heads up! Other than that, wonderful website!

    Like

    Reply

  41. An interesting discussion is worth comment. I believe that you should write
    more on this topic, it may not be a taboo
    subject but typically people do not discuss such subjects. To
    the next! Kind regards!!

    Like

    Reply

  44. It is appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it
    is time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you
    some interesting things or advice. Maybe you can write next
    articles referring to this article. I want to read even more things about it!

    Like

    Reply

  48. I am really inspired together with your writing skills as neatly as with the structure for your weblog.
    Is this a paid subject or did you customize it
    your self? Anyway stay up the nice quality writing, it is uncommon to
    peer a great weblog like this one today..

    Like

    Reply

Leave a comment